Hey guys! I know . . . I know . . . I have been MIA! It’s been a while since my last post, and believe it or not, I have had a couple supporters come up to me and remind me that I haven’t posted. So for those of you who actively read and support this blog, please accept my apology for the delay in posting. Things have been crazy! I completed a 40 day Daniel’s Fast, work has been nuts, and my teaching & speaking schedule has increased. It all has been great stuff and I can’t wait to share with each of you all of the learnings and “ah ha” moments I have had during my time of study.
So with all the “craziness” (good crazy) that has been going on in my life, this blog post is very fitting. So let’s just get to it!:
What is it about most women that make us strive for perfection in everything? I mean EVERYTHING! We try to be the perfect wife, mother, sister, daughter, friend, girlfriend . . . we try to be perfect at work, school, ministry, and whatever else we have going on. Once we realize that we are not perfect, that we do drop the ball at times, or that we are not doing something as good / “perfect” as we would like to, we tend to beat ourselves up. We begin to feel guilty about our short comings . . . when really, who says we have to be perfect?
Okay . . . maybe I need to speak for myself. I have a tendency to be my own worst critic. The more I add to my plate the worse I am on myself. Even when I do something well, I tend to seek out what I could have done better.
- “I could’ve been a better friend to her.”
- “I should’ve spent a little more time talking with my mother on the phone.”
- “I never got around to calling that person from church that I’ve been praying for.”
- “Oh I really dropped the ball on that project at work.”
- “I talk with my hands to much when I present in front of people.”
- “I say ‘um’ too much when teaching/speaking.”
- “I suck as an aunt sometimes.”
- “I can’t believe I was late.”
- “I want to make every event I’m invited to show my support, but I can’t be everywhere. Man this sucks . . . I hope she/he knows how much I love them. How much I support them.”
- “I haven’t posted that blog yet!!!”
- “I should’ve been a little more clear in what I wrote.”
- “I wish I was more organized.”
Every now and then I have to give myself a break!! It’s okay!! (I can hear my friend now saying, “Hazel relax . . . just chill . . . it’s going to be okay”) I have to remind myself that I’m not going to wear all of the hats I have to wear every single day! I’m just not! Why? Because I’m human! I’m not perfect! Yes . . . I strive to be better than the day before, but guess what? . . . life happens! I can’t beat myself up every time something is not done perfectly, every time I couldn’t pull through for someone, or when I had to say No! Yep, sometimes you have to say: No! And let it be just that . . . No! Practice me . . . stop reading and say out loud in a bold voice . . . NO! . . . how does that feel? . . . don’t feel guilty, stand on your “no” . . . it’s okay . . . now continue reading lol
So, when I feel myself being overly critical, I try to look at the hats I have to wear in a day; if I wore just one hat well then that was a good day. How did you wear your hats today? Was today the day your wore your “mommy hat” well, but your “friend hat” not so well? It was a good day then! Or did you wear your “friend hat” well, but your “project hat” kept slipping off? Guess what . . . today was a good day then!
It’s all about finding balance and prioritizing. No matter how many hats you have to wear in a day, you have to always remember to take care of self! Without self care, you can’t properly wear the hats you own. Figure out which hat has more priority over others. Take each day and celebrate the hats you wore well, knowing that tomorrow is a new day to try again! Give yourself a break!